Tuesday, January 26, 2010

a letter to nick jr.

Dear Nick Jr. (formerly known as Noggin but still really known as Noggin because I don't know of one single person who calls it Nick Jr because, let's face it, Noggin is just a cuter name, I'm just sayin'),

(inhales)

I am writing to inform you that very soon I will be putting in a call to Social Services to report the gross parental negligence I have observed by many of the residents of your Nickelodeon Neighborhood.

Let's take, for example, Max and Ruby. After 11 months of observation I have never, EVER seen their parents. As in I'm pretty sure they don't even exist. The children are constantly home alone, only being dropped in upon, every once in a while, by their grandmother. Max, obviously a child two or under seeing as how he can only speak one word at a time, is being cared for by his sister, Ruby, who can't possibly be more than six years old seeing as how she's an idiot. I do not feel this is a good environment for either child and thus will be reporting the Bunny Family to the proper authorities. I am glad that Ruby has her ever-true Bunny Scout Leader to guide her although I don't think the party-hosting skills she is being taught are going to prove very beneficial in the raising of her younger brother.

I am also very concerned about Dora the Abnormally Large Headed Exploradora. Although her parents, Sr. and Sra. Marquez, do appear every now and again, she is often seen out on her own, accompanied only by a whiny monkey. She has faced many a foe (a witch, a troll, a fox) with only her backpack to protect her. And I know she always uses her seatbelt "so she can be safe," but am I mistaken that Dora should still be in a car seat? I am fairly certain she does not meet the eight year / 80 pound requirement. Although I suppose this law may not apply when you are traveling to OUTER SPACE, you know, by yourself.

Lastly, I will be reporting ALL of the neglectful animal parents whose children have found themselves in such peril they've had to call on the Wonder Pets. I feel if you are relying on a guinea pig, a turtle, and a baby duck to rescue your children, you have reached a whole new level of inattention. I'm sorry but if you, as a goose, flew off and left your children to be led south by some classroom pets in a plastic boat, don't you think you should be reported? And don't even get me started on the ladybug's parents who let her play in the Venus Fly Trap or the Mama cow who barely reacted when her baby calf was rescued from a tree (that's right, a tree).

The parents of all the Backyardigans are still under observation, and at this point, there is no reason to suspect negligence on their part. So far, the children have stayed within the confines of their backyard, and at least one parent seems to be home during their playtime, offering a delightful yet nutritious snack at the end of their imaginary adventures.

Please be under advisement that the entire Nickelodeon Junior (if that's your real name) populace is being watched.

Yours Truly,
Patrice Williams

P.S. - And as far as DJ Lance is concerned, the whole Gabba Family is currently under investigation for recreational drug use. Second letter to follow.

162 comments:

Mrs. JKPeterson said...

I laughed so hard I almost pee pee my pants. Which is really not good.
But, Thank you!

Victoria said...

This cracks me up - soooo true. Glad someone is finally going to do something about it...lol. Your great Patrice!

Jacquelyn Phillips said...

HILLARIOUS! Especially Ruby being an idiot.

Kristie said...

That was hilarious. You must be seriously sleep deprived!

Kirsten said...

HAHAHAHA!! I know, right?? I have totally thought all these things.

Ang said...

FUNNY!

Our life is a bowl of Barry's said...

Oh my gosh Patrice, that was ever so funny!! You have a wicked sense of humor (a word borrowed from my 10 year olds. I think Disney may need some of your intervention too.....

Lauren said...

LOL you are so funny... I have seen a bit of max and ruby when my nephews have watched it and you are SO right about the lack of parents!!!!

Crystal said...

Oh my so very funny. My kids love Max and Ruby and for the life of me I can't understand it. The whole parent thing has come up among me and my mom before lol. Don't get me started on Yo Gaba Gaba.

Megan said...

PATRICE THIS IS HYSTERICAL!!!!!! You are 1) SO creative and 2) SO funny and 3) SO observant! lol because I've seen these shows and never noticed those things haahahaha thanks for the laugh :)

*Megan from Wi*

Becca said...

Love it! I have always thought the same things. Especially about Max and Ruby. Where are the parents? Should she really be using the oven unattended? And riding the bus all over town alone?

The Hill Family said...

hilarity ensued while I read your post...another thing I often wonder...why do they seem to encourage children to play with insects? On dora they play with ants, on yo gabba gabba they talk about spiders and worms and ladybugs...I don't know about you but I don't need anyone encouraging my 3 sons to play with strange, possibly poisonous insects...I'm just sayin'

Aubree said...

love it.

Dawn said...

That was hilarious and totally true!

Alicia said...

Oh my gosh, this cracked me up. I have always wondered about Max and Ruby and had to ask my kids if Ruby was his sister and where the parents are. Dora is funny too the way she wanders around everywhere without parents. I do like the backyardigans as they are only playing in their backyard with their "imagination." Thank you for the laughs tonight.

dancingqueenre said...

Oh how funny!! Loved it!! Please, please, please post your comments on Yo Gabba Gabba. I believe they are created with people who are definitely in acid flashbacks!!

Buckles Family said...

Hilarious!!

Jenifer said...

Girl, you are cracking me up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We've had the same observations about Max and Ruby at our house!

ninnifur said...

OH MY GOODNESS!!! I just laughed that entire time! I'm not a mom, just a nanny, but I feel the same way about those shows! I cannot stand max and ruby and i was cracking up when you said the thing about her being an idiot. man that was awesome!! thanks for the laughs and for helping me not study for my Anatomy test! lol

Tania said...

You're killing me! Super funny. I wonder what Jonah thinks...

Heather said...

What a gift your humor is!!!

Hard Workin' Ma'am said...

OH MY GOODNESS....I can not stop laughing, this was so freakin' funny. You are just right on. We have discussed these shows so many times in our house. Our 3.5 year old just took a bath with his Wonder Pet bath toys and didn't understand why Ming Ming and Tuck couldn't float - they kept flipping over....Awesome post!!

Melissa said...

i think im crying out of laughter for once-thank god!!

thankyou so much, i think we all needed that:D

I'm Erin. said...

Ha! Love it!

Jen said...

I am laughing so hard and, over the past 6 months, have made many of the same observations of these shows! Well said, dead on and SO FUNNY!

DJones said...

That was awesome! I have wondered about a few of those myself... glad to see that someone has finally put those in charge on notice! :)

Jill said...

Oh, Patrice. You are in some need of adult conversation and TV. I absolutely feel your pain while watching my son zone-out to one of these shows. One thing you can add to your "letter" is how offensive their new tag line is. "It's like pre-school on tv." Not that I mind my son watching a little here and there, but this is insulting to parents and teachers everywhere if they think Ruby & Dora can prep our kids for pre-school. However, my husband is convinced that all the words we can't understand from our toddler are Spanish. Who knows.

Keep it coming! And get some sleep.

Jessica said...

Ha! Completely agree about Gabba.....that show scares me.

Coco said...

I laughed so hard I cried! You even got my husband laughing! I might have to post it on my blog (with full recognition of course!), and with your permission! Love it!

Angie said...

Cracked me up!

Sailor and Co said...

THIS IS HYSTERICAL. ABSOLUTELY HYSTERICAL!

jenlar3 said...

Psst. Take a look at Peanuts. The only adult I have ever heard was the teacher, "whaw whaw whaw whaw." Pigpen especially seems to be very neglected. ;)

Rachel said...

FUNNY, FUNNY, FUNNY! My husband and I laughed hard at this! We were just talking about how awful Yo, Gabba, Gabba was and we have often wondered about how Max and Ruby survive on their own.

RLR said...

Love. This. Post. (Never liked Max and Ruby. DJ Lance and his crew - oh, my!) I needed a laugh today - thanks for this refreshing dose of good humor!
I also think Noggin was a way cooler name, and my kids don't call it Nick Jr., either.

the-mommy-person said...

Just what I needed. There ARE worse parents out there than myself. :) Thanks.

Darcy said...

hahaha that was great!! I am so glad you added the yo gababa drug use at the end... man that show is FREAKY!

Bridgesfam said...

This post had me rolling. I too have concerns for Max and Ruby. And I have wondered many a times what they're smoking on Yo Gabba Gabba. Too bad my daughter loves that show.

Janel Waters said...

This is probably some of the funniest stuff I have read in a really really LONG TIME!!! SERIOUSLY - LOL!!!

Yo Gabba Gabba - don't even get me started! WHAT IS THAT GREEN THING?!?!?!?!?!?!

The Alger Family said...

I couldn't have said it better myself! LOL :) I'm still convinced that Yo Gabba Gabba was thought up during a night of recreational drug use.

Lisa said...

FUNNIEST POST EVER!!!!!

You forgot to mention that Dora is an idiot too. She has to have everything repeated 3 times, and is always lost despite the fact she carries a talking map, otherwise known as GPS to the rest of us.

Jennifer said...

Thank you so much for making me laugh at this late hour. I was laughing and nodding my head and agreeing with everything you said. :) So very very true! :) I can't wait to show my hubby in the morning! :)

Kat and Crew said...

SO FUNNY! I was just saying the other day that LITTLE BEAR is always off with no supervision. Now watch Caillou (on PBS Sprout) and his parents will annoy you so much you wish they would disappear.

Beth.. One Blessed Nana said...

Patrice - you are perhaps the funniest person ever! I just loved this and laughed out loud the whole way through.

Only, Dora MAY meet the 80 pound mark when you factor in the weight of her ginormous head!

Beth

Perfection in my Imperfection said...

I laughed so hard when reading your post as I have stated some of the very some concerns/issues you have posted. I dislike Ruby and Max a LOT. LOL My baby boy is 5 years old and I have been wondering what to do as well. A well placed letter was a GREAT and innovative idea. Thank you for sharing and if you begin a petition I am all for adding my signature. lol

Oh and off topic.. sense this is my first time leaving a comment. I have been reading for a long time and I admire your family and determination. I pray for you and your family.

SchultzMomma said...

This is HILARIOUS!! Thanks for the laugh & for speaking "aloud" what I've often thought only to myself.

Andrea and Andre said...

Dre says, "What's gonna work? TEAMWORK! What's gonna work? TEAMWORK..." He kinda likes that show.

Laura A said...

LOVE THIS! Am laughing so hard right now - especially the part about Dora and her large Noggin!

Thanks for giving us all a good laugh this evening!

Love from TX!
Laura

Nancy Bane said...

Oh, Patrice, I am laughing so hard right now! You've really pegged it, and I've wondered about Max and Ruby's parents myself. Someone should call DHS!

dg darling said...

Amen Sista! I think those same things every freakin' day!!! I however have not found the eloquence to express my concerns that seems to come to you naturally. I will be eagerly awaiting your next letter.

P.S. Have you ever wondered why Caillou's head is like 3 times larger than anybody else's and his parents are seemingly unconcerned by his lack of hair or permenantly whiny voice???

Denise said...

I never thought about the parents missing thing - but it is true. My daughter is 4 and watches all these cartoons... Thanks for a good laugh tonight.

AndiJoy said...

I am dying laughing over here. I just have one thing to add about Dora. Why do her parents allow her to wear the belly shirts? I mean come on....that's ridiculous!!! My husband was cracking up too. And clearly, DJ Lance is a bit frightening in his orange spandex and fluffy cap. Hysterical! Thanks Patrice!

Analiza said...

AHAHAHA!!! This is HILARIOUS! LOVED IT!

Stephens Family News said...

HAHAHA!!! So very true!!! :o)

Wanda Wilkinson said...

You have missed your calling--you should be a comedian you are HILARIOUS!!!!!!

Happy 11 month Birthday--Jonah do we get a Jonah post today? I am sure you have been doing wonderful things. By the way, your mom needs to get out in the adult world a little more..she is critiquing (sp) your tv watching --you are in big trouble down the road. Ha

FUNNY, FUNNY, FUNNY

Love ya

Emelie said...

Hurray for Jonah..11 month!

Emelie

Leeby said...

That is seriously so funny!!!! I know it's not Noggin, BUT--I have been saying this about The Man With The Yellow Hat for years. Besides the horrible way that their relationship began, he seems to not have ever learned--DO NOT LEAVE GEORGE UNSUPERVISED. And usually TMWTYH points out the most dangerous thing around..."Here George, sit right here next to this exciting looking baggage carousel, and be a GOOD LITTLE MONKEY"....he WILL NOT be a good little monkey!!!!!!! Who leaves their kid (monkey) alone in an airport anyway?

Bess said...

You just made coffee come out my nose...

HILARIOUS!!!

vanettens said...

That was HILARIOUS! I read it to my husband and we were cracking up! Did you make that up? If so, it needs to be published somewhere. And if you need any other signatures, I will sign because I totally agree:)

jess said...

That made my morning, LOL. Thanks!!!!!!!!!

Erin said...

you are one of the funniest people I have never met!!! Your are hilarious Girl. you are soooo right about the noggin shows. too funny. Yo!GabbaGabba is my youngest son's {bowen} FAVORITE show. they are def. tripping on acid or something! where are the new pics of jonut?! i miss his precious smile :) much love and blessings from ga~erin

Charisa said...

funny!

Mandi @ It's come to this said...

HYSTERICAL!!!

Tracie said...

Love it!
Caillou drives me nuts on PBS!

Lauren said...

you're a trip, girl.

(totally agree with yo gabba gabba, by the way.)

Jen said...

We actually had to ban Max & Ruby from our home. My 3 year old kept immitating Max by throwing things and using only one word repeatedly. Who knew cartoon animated bunnies could wreak such havoc...

Amanda said...

The best blog post ever!!! My 3 year old wants to know "what is soo funny mommy"~!

KM said...

Funny! All those "free-range kids" on TV :)

Made me think of this funny post- well, really the best stuff is in the comments:

http://freerangekids.wordpress.com/2010/01/20/the-lion-the-witch-and-the-car-seat/

KM said...

Let me make that easier...

http://freerangekids.wordpress.com/2010/01/20/the-lion-the-witch-and-the-car-seat/

Tiffany said...

Buhahahha!!! Hilarious! This was so well written! I loved reading it - thanks for the laugh!

Patty said...

You are totally "da bomb" Patrice. You ARE sleep deprived and in your state of mind.....you are the greatest. I am speechless at how funny and creative you are. Jonah has the bestest mommy around and she has a great sense of humor. Keep on keepin' on girl.

Jessica said...

That was hysterical. I was reading it out loud to Mr. Hubby and we completely agree about that Gabba gabba dude using drugs. My kids don't watch that show.

Mr. Hubby actually laughed outloud when you called Ruby an idiot.

My question: how does this enhance learning? When the characters are idiots and possibly using drugs? I'm just sayin.

Jaymie said...

OMG! too funny, after 4 years of watching this station, I couldnt have said it better myself! Too Funny!

Jennifer said...

That was great! Also, what about the fact that Little Bear never wears any clothes while his parents (and grandparents) are always fully dressed?!? That drives me crazy!

Heather said...

That was too funny! while the hubby and I have no kids of our own, we are "aunt and uncle" (but not legally) to an adorable 2 year old girl. My husband took a while to adjust to the Noggin shows and at this point can only stand The Backyardigans. The Wonder Pets make him nuts... with their ridiculous missions and such. He has concluded that shows like this (along with the TERRIBLE programming they see once they move up to full on Nickelodean) explains so much...

You are very witty Patrice!

Trace Car Driver said...

ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!
i HATE HATE HATE max and ruby. they are a bad influence on my boys, my 2 yr old points at stuff and says juice. car. tree. although he can form much longer sentences, i find him talking like max and boy does it get on my nerves!!!!
love this post. can't wait to see the next letter to nick jr!

prayed for sweet jonah this morning. hope he is having a great day!

southern love and prayers from alabama!

Angie said...

this was very funny and I have always wondered about Max and Ruby myself..

Blessings
Angie

Becca B. said...

Seriously HILARIOUS! I love it!

Life Is... said...

You took the words right out of my mouth!! Thanks for the good laugh ( I knowyou need one every now and then) Love reading your blog:)

The Chaney's said...

This had me laughing out loud! Well said. : )

Katie said...

Hysterical! I often wonder the same things. I don't let mine watch Yo Gabba Gabba, but my 2.5 year old loves the wonder pets. Seriously, why would the mama and daddy crane leave their baby crane in the direct path of the lava flow from a volcano? Somebody call DHR!!

While you're at it, write a letter to PBS and ask them why Caillou is still bald at 4 years old and why his parents let him say "Ya" instead of "Yes ma'am or Yes Sir."

Misc Momma said...

Uh, I have wondered the same thing about Max & Ruby (as well as the drug use re: Yo Gabba Gabba), but all the rest rings true as well.

Jaime said...

Best post I have read in awhile!

Melanie said...

You are hilarious!!! I am in total agreeance with you, but I am certainly not that creative in putting my thoughts down like you....awesome!

jandkland said...

Ha ha ha ha ha!!! We are Playhouse Disney and PBS Kids fans around here, but I'm sure I could write similar letters about their shows. Thanks for the laugh, Patrice!

--Kelley in GA

Ricci said...

Haha,
I completely agree about recreational drug use on that show.
Weird.

I've read your blog for quite a while and haven't commented... but this was too, too funny.

Maythi said...

oh my goodness. i was laughing out loud! i love it. it was all so true. by the way, although you probably already know this w/your spanish background and all, did you know Dora is named Dora because she is an exploraDORA? i figured that one out last year. so much to learn on children's programming! and i am totally w/you on DJ Lance. if you've ever seen "Leslie" that does the funky dance in the tight golden spandex outfit, then it's pretty obvious they're ALL on something!

Jill said...

Oh.My.Gosh. That was so funny!!

rameelin said...

Dude...this post made my life. I have often thought the same things, and although gabba gabba makes me dance to the beat, I'm with you--it often makes me too happy. Love it!

Stacey said...

Oh no...you didn't! =)

Take Little Bill away and there's nothing to salvage! =)

bcv0524 said...

OK, you are just too funny!! All of what you wrote is so true. I love that you called Ruby an idiot...she is also extremely rude and bossy to Max!! The funniest part to me was your P.S. about Yo Gabba Gabba. I don't get the show at all and I definitely think there are some recreational drug users that created it :)

Christina said...

Patrice you are so funny! What a great sense of humor you have....I was literally cracking up! Gosh I wish I knew you in real life. I think we'd get along fabulously ;) At the very least Id be laughing ALL the time!!

Cassidy said...

Too funny! I can't stand Olivia but at least her parents are around and her mom runs a successful home business! My beef is that Diego and Kai Lan are just copies of the Dora scenario. Next they'll have Dirk with his German speaking animal friends and Sophie with her band of exploring french poodles. Wonder Pets is the favorite at our house right now. Thank goodness we've now passed the DJ Lance time. The episode with Jack Black scares Riley and she cries when it comes on.

Josh, Morgan, and Our Girls said...

I've read your blog for months...but never left a comment. But I just HAD to comment here! SO FUNNY!!! My thoughts exactly...and yet, we continue to let our children watch this nonsense! :)

Ashley said...

HA HA. I love this post. So funny about Yo Gabba Gabba!

Becca said...

This is quite possibly the best post ever.

Rachaellh said...

Oh Patrice! You are eternally funny! That was exactly what I needed this morning. You are the best!

Angela said...

LOVE.IT. Especially the Dora part. My 10 and 7 yo still occasionally watch Dora when their younger sister does just so they can make fun of it. They have themselves in stitches the whole time.

brandie said...

LOL you're great! What an awesome way to start my day, reading this!

Scout812 said...

Don't get me started on the Upside-down show........

Also, why does Noggin feel the need to only air like, four episodes over and over and over and over again?

kg said...

This was the best!!!
Thank you!

Elizabeth said...

This is all SO true...I've been saying the same things for 2 years...seriously, what is up with Dora's head? And "older Dora"...as featured in the Christmas special, has a normal-sized head...so I Guess she has some sort of cranial reduction surgery at some point. Oh well...at least most of the shows on Nick-el-noggin have been shown to support language development!

Super B's Mom said...

THIS is one of the funniest things I have ever read. I can relate to this so well!! Although it's been a couple of years since our son watched Max & Ruby - I'll never forget the afternoon that my husband looked up from his recliner and said, "Are they orphan rabbits? I'm just wondering because I've never seen their parents."

Thanks so much for the laugh. And as for Yo Gabba Gabba? Cruel and unusual punishment.

Jenni said...

I am so with you on this. Gabba Gabba - what are you smoking?

Amanda said...

FINALLY!!! A partner in crime!!! I have been saying these things for years!! Or at least since I've had children.

If it wasn't for the fact that my 14 month old sits motionless as he open-mouthed stares at DJ Lance and his 5 ridiculously dressed midget friends--I would never get dinner cooked every night!!!

This is serious problem, and I'd bet there would be some new disclaimers before each show to explain where these parents really are, instead of telling me how my child's brain is going to be stimulized, and how it teachs him social skills. If my son starts talking to blue dogs, clothe-laden bunnies, a monkey wearing boots, or kids that get to skip school and dance and sing all day, then I'll assume he's inhaling the same thing DJ Lance is......

Lauren said...

I cant tell you how many times my husband and I have had this exact conversation!! Especially about Dora's GINORMOUS head.
Have you ever thought of becoming a comedian, in your spare time? ;) You are seriously hilarious! Thank you for this post!!!

Pogue Mahone said...

So I'm NOT the only one who thinks Dora(and a myriad of other characters,too!) has a Big Head No Shape!What's with that ugly Spongebob,too? That thing is just sooo UGLY with those bug eyes, buck-gapped teeth and spindly arms and legs! I think the bigger the head and the uglier they are, the more kids like them,and don't even get me started on that annoying Barney!

Tabatha said...

This just made my day!

Michele said...

Brilliant. =0)

Amy said...

That has to be the most hillarious thing I have read in a long time...

The sad fact is that I should have reported this at least 4 years ago when I watching it all unfold daily. Thanks for stepping up to the plate and reporting Noggin!

I need that laugh so bad today..thanks!

Eaton Party of Five said...

AWESOME!!!! I'm dying over here!!!!

Marty and Kim said...

Hysterical!!!!

Kerri said...

I am so glad someone else has noticed these things! :)

froggieang said...

You are a trip...I am laughing so hard!! I needed a good laugh!! Love your Blog!!! I watch it daily to follow up on my little Jonah prayer buddy!!

Love,
The Petroff's

Mary Sharp said...

It was so uplifting to see your letter today. as a mother of five, i can completely relate. Even my boyfriend loved it!!Yo Gabba Gabba is just plain frightening (enough said). Love to see that you can keep your spirits up. you have an awesome sense of humor!! Thank you!

Candi said...

Ha! Thanks for the laughs!

Liz said...

LOVE THIS!!! I totally agree with Ruby being an idiot. I feel sorry for Max every episode for having to deal with her. And Yo Gabba Gabba folks have to smoking something to be that way. No wonder Jack Black was a guest on the show.

lori_schott said...

LMAO

Katie said...

OMG. Thank you thank you thank you! I needed that! HALARIOUS!

Katie said...

Please make sure to post your follow up letter about Yo Gabba gabba. That one orange thing looks like a deranged penis with an STD.

James Patrick said...

Thank you! Thank you for this laugh you have given me today! I truly needed a good one and this was SO funny! My husband and I have many time talked about the lack of parents of Max and Ruby! lol thank you!

Kelli said...

HA-HA!! Needed this today!!

Kristi J said...

That's great! I love how you ended it with Yo Gabba Gabba! I was smiling to myself through your whole post, but the last part made me laugh out loud!

And I agree, Noggin was a much better name!

sandy said...

If you watch Max and Ruby closely enough there is a family photo hanging over the couch. They apparently have both a mother and father! I use to be really bothered by Ruby when my son was little. When my bossy daughter came along, I am a little more tolerant of her! Especially since she allows me to fold laundry every now and then.

ForTheBirds said...

Thanks for the giggle Patrice! I needed it today!

ForTheBirds said...

the show 'Little Bear' used to drive me crazy... his parents wore clothes, but he did not! And in one episode, he found his baby clothes... I mean, I know my toddler likes to run around naked, but I have to draw a line somewhere right?

Rhonda said...

I have made the same observation about Ruby for a long time. I'm so glad someone is taking action. ;)

Weird Unsocialized Mom said...

Oh, my goodness, Patrice! That is seriously the funniest, most accurate assessment of Nick Jr./Noggin that I've read in a long time. Thanks for the laugh.

Jill said...

I totally agree about Max and Ruby! I constantly ask my husband where their parents are. Of course, he just looks at me like I'm insane! And do not get me started on Yo Gabba Gabba! I can't stand that show one bit! Drug use? Absolutely! Haha! Loved your post!

alaplage_32 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
alaplage_32 said...

LOVE IT! I totally agree with your evaluation of Yo Gabba Gabba. My 3 yr old refuses to watch that show.

dragonflyz in June said...

I laughed so hard Patrice! I never looked at it that way, hilarious! Thanks for the laughs, keep them coming!
BTW, congratulations to you all on Jonah's dedication!
Peace & Blessings
Crystal

Kellye said...

Honey, you nailed it. And yes, Ruby is an idiot. "Maa-aaax" gets on my last nerve...

Cristi said...

First of all I think it's funny that you have well over a hundred comments on this! It is too funny . Ahem but I must say you have to lay off Dora! Avery loves Dora! She sings with her and dances to her and is so entertained by her. So say what you will about all the rest but leave Dora out of it! Lol

teacheroftwos said...

OMG! too funny!

Y Mama said...

Patrice, I NEVER comment on any blogs, but THIS WAS HYSTERICAL!!! I LOVED it! My husband and I always have the exact conversatin you just wrote about!!
Thanks for the great laugh at the end of a really long day!!

Cathi said...

Doncha know that Dora fits the 80lb requirement, because her head alone weighs that much?? Loved this post LOL

Whitney said...

Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh tonight!!

kathunt said...

Ok~ seriously I am laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes. I totally agree with you. We watch a bit of Nick Jr. at our house (& I have even caught my self watching when B’s not around, HA!) My son Bennett’s favorite show is Blues Clues ~ he has a little dance for the songs, and I even find my self wanting to see what Blue wants to do. As far as Dora goes, she totally freaks my husband out with the way she blinks at you. I have also wondered where Max & Ruby’s parents are, but they do have a catchy theme song. The Backyardagains have lovely voices, I love there little songs. & YoGabbaGabba is just totally wild ~ the song “A party in my tummy” is a Hunt family favorite.
Your blog is great, I check it often & I love all the Jonah pics. You guys are in our prayer!!!

Hewett Happenings said...

My thoughts exactly on Max and Ruby. NEVER have liked them. LOVE the Backyardigans!

Breanna said...

OMG that was Hilarious!!!

The funny thing is, is that my kids watch all of those shows.. haha

Jimmie's Auntie Amber said...

OMG Patrice-- you totally just made my day. I read this out loud to my husband as the 2 kids are in bed and something other than Noggin is finally on t.v. for the first time today.

So clever, so hilarious!

I love YOU!

Amber

Krista said...

LOL! Hilariously funny!

This needs to be published somewhere other than the Interwebs. Too funny not be in a magazine or something! :-)

the*4*of*us said...

my kids are always asking where max and ruby's parents are! my 5 year-old is convinced they died...my 8 year old can't stand Ruby!
I laughed so hard at the Gabba part!!

Rachael said...

Hilarious! The whole Max and Ruby thing TOTALLY bugs me!

Jen McD said...

That's hysterical!

I have to ditto everything you said!

Jen said...

Okay-this is hilarious! I will say that I am VERY happy we have not had to endure any of these shows in my house as my children are 17, 14, 12, and 10. However, I could have written this same letter about ten years ago regarding a group of children being looked after by a big purple dinosaur and a certain bald-headed kid with a STRANGE French(?) name who needs to learn some hard lessons about respect and obedience!

ishatrisha said...

have you seen "toot and puddle"...i can't quite figure out their relationship, but it is just weird! they live in the middle of nowhere, taking care of opal, and they go on vacations around the world! its just strange!

also, pinky dinky doo and the upside down show really get on my nerves!

i am very fond of yo gabba gabba, wonder pets, backyardigans, and jack's big music show...i love lori berkner, and at the end when jack's mom almost always says, "you and that clubhouse"

i loathe max and ruby, pinky dinky doo, dora the explorer, and toot and puddle.

olivia is growing on me!

i still choose nick jr. over all the other channels, because they don't have commercials!

anyway, your breakdown of the nick jr. scene was priceless!

things we'll do and watch for our kids!

trisha

Angie said...

THIS IS SO STINKIN' FUNNY!!!! I have never commented on your blog but I pray for Jonah daily! Congrats on 11 months!!!!

Precious 3 said...

I laughed so hard I cried and almost spit out my hot cocoa! I'll have to remember to wait and read one of your posts before taking a sip :) We have been asking these same questions for years: where are these kids parents?

Amy said...

you crack me up

Tara said...

oh how I agree with the Gabba Family! I cringe when that show comes on but Kennedi runs to the tv. UGH!! That red thing is just very disturbing to me!

sclangs said...

OMG...that was the funniest thing EVER!!!! Hope that the people/adults over at Noggin (I still call it that even though my 4yr old argues with me that it is Nick Jr.) will listen to your concerns and see to it that social services isn't called on those families!!! :)

Rachelle said...

Your p.s. was hilarious! Oh my goodness, why do my kids like yo gabba gabba so much! And what does that mean, anyway!

Gotta say, too, that I think the wonder pets are cute, but the duck's speech problem drives me crazy and I finally drew the line at the "Puppy who has to pee pee" episode!

thanks for the laugh!

Kristen said...

So absolutely hilarious! I, too, often wonder about the whereabouts of Max and Ruby's parents. Max will grow up to be a crack dealer if he continues to only have the influence of nagging Ruby... ;)

The Parker's said...

Bwahahahahahaha!!!!! Yo Gabba Gabba -- yikes.

kidsdogs4me said...

I think you have definitely lost it now! You are just too funny:0 Where do you come up with all this stuff? As for Yo Gabba Gabba, I hated the show. But once my little one decided he liked it and I was forced to watch it, it's not so bad. And the songs are pretty catchy, especially when my 2 yr. old is trying to sing along:)

Hope said...

I'm cracking up! That was hilarious.

Clint, Brielle, and Molly J. said...

I agree with all of your findings - I'd also like to add that the voice of the map on Dora sounds like a deranged maniac trying to lure kids in to his car. Very disturbing indeed. Keep up the good work!

Tricia said...

Too cute! Noggin was Nick Jr before it was Noggin.

I haven't been able to read consistently for a while, but I have been praying for your family daily. You have been on my heart even more in the last week. Now I know why. I will keep praying. God bless you and yours.

Twigs @ Twiggles and Trunks said...

lolololololololol awesome. although i think Max is autistic, which makes his absent parents even more worriesome.

Kerin Lee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kerin Lee said...

I know I am terribly late on this one, but while I've followed your blog for a long while now, I missed this one. One of my girls posted the link on my Facebook page.

THIS is the best thing I've read in a long time. SOOOOO funny. Max & Ruby especially got me because I often wonder what's up with that one. I mean come on! Ruby puts Max to bed, changes his PJs when he gets them dirty the umpteenth time, gives him his bath, gives him his meals (if they can be called that), the list goes on!

I also am convinced there are people taking their acid trips while watching Yo Gabba Gabba. But hey, that's all for now, I've got to go because there's a party in my tummy!! (So yummy! So yummy!)

-Kerin @ hergoodintentions.blogspot.com