Monday, May 18, 2009

the danger of facebook

There are reasons I don't spend much time on Facebook. I bet you think you know what they are. You are thinking...

- there are not enough hours in the day
- it's addictive
- it would keep me from blogging
- I'm way too great of a mom taking care of Jonah to engage in such frivolity

You are wrong.

The reason I stay away from Facebook is because of the quizzes. And it's not because they would take up too much of my time. No, no. It's because I find the quiz results uncannily accurate, and they reveal truths too disturbing to mention out loud. They tell you things about yourself that you only silently admit in your most secret parts, but would never, ever tell anyone. They are right on, dead accurate, truth. They pretty much shape the person you are becoming. It's really nothing more than a self-fulfilling prophecy. And they're dangerous, and I just can't submit myself to such disturbing revelations.

Patrice, WHAT are you talking about?

I'll tell you, friends. The other day I took a quiz on Facebook. Maybe you know it. It's one entitled, "Which TV mom are you?" "Oh, this is great," I thought. Just sure that I would be June Cleaver, Carol Brady, or at least Claire Huxtable. But no. Sadly, no.

Here was the description of the kind of mom I am -

You are an independent, feisty, outspoken mom. You work hard to make a good life for your family, but it's not always easy balancing work and home. You'll do anything for your kids and often tell them exactly what you think!

Doesn't sound so bad, right? WRONG.

Here is the cold, hard truth. And as much as I hate to admit, she is a woman I CAN identify with. Take out the cuss words and the crude sexual references, and I really think our parenting styles are similar. That's right, friends. The TV mom I'm most similar to is...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

ROSEANNE





Poor, poor Jonah. But it can't be helped. Facebook has spoken. And so it shall be.

51 comments:

Stacie said...

girl, if you think the quizzes are addictive, (and so uncannily accurate), don't ever ever play farmtown.

Stacie said...

and, i know we don't "know" each other, but i totally just acted like we do. (it's more fun that way, in the blog world.) but, to introduce, i am stacie. i have been a peds/nicu/mother-baby nurse for the last, oh about 10 years, of my life. i have been following your blog since jonah was born and praying for your sweet boy (and family) since then. i currently live just south of asheville, but lived near nashville, tn (in franklin) until about 2 years ago.

The Darling Dukes said...

YOU ARE SO RIGHT! I am one of your many prayer warriors and yes, blog stalker and I TOTALLY agree with the facebook quiz thing! SCARY! Just had to comment on this b/c I thought it was hilarious!Have you taken the one where they tell you how old you 'really' are?!

Anonymous said...

oh gosh, this post was hysterical! loved it :D -megan from wi

MelH said...

LOL!!! I literally laughed out loud because I got the same answer on mine. I KNEW I liked you!

RZ said...

good to know I am in good company because apparently I am roseanne also!!!

Anonymous said...

Haa Haa! That's hilarious!
Thanks for the laugh, Patrice!
Still praying for you and your men:)
Carlee
ps- I don't go on facebook- but I might have to now just to check out those quizzes! lol

Jo said...

Stacie, you are SO RIGHT. I'm so addicted to Farm Town. Stay away Patrice, stay away if you can. Farm Town has become an addiction. Luckily my husband plays too or it might cause issues in my marriage. :D

P.S. Stacie, want to be neighbors? If so then email me. *shifty eyes*

as written by Barbara said...

Patrice...
Okay... I'm on Facebook and agree with you. The quizzes are addictive. They are also very weird and scarey. They are not accurate in my thoughts... i.e. supposedly I'm Carol Brady, with a type B personality, liking the color purple, acting like the Biblical character King David with the favorite animal of a dog.
I stopped after that!
Praying for God to send you peace and some rest.
With Hugs,
Barbara Lee (nee) Lyman :o
Marysville, WA

RLR said...

I took the "What's Your Parenting Style" Quiz and got "Sort of Crunchy" as the answer. Um, I don't think many people would describe me that way, even though I do try to make healthy choices. I haven't take the "Which TV mom are you?" quiz. I am afraid of the answer!

Janel Waters said...

Ya know...Roseanne is not so bad as the TV mom I am.... oh yes - Sharon Osborne! Oh yea! And apparently I am the Smoke Monster from Lost!

I thought I was a decent law abiding, God worshiping woman but apparently my life has been reduced to Smoke Monster!

I dare you not to take the Lost quiz now......

Janel :)

Laura A said...

Oh, that is too funny! I took that same quiz and did come out as Carol Brady. Heaven help me!

But I will say the quizzes aren't always completely accurate. I took the "how many kids will you have" quiz (just to see what would happen), and the result was 2 boys. This is partially correct - I have at least two boys! I actually have 3 boys and 2 girls! :)

And I echo Jo's post below - RUN AWAY from Farm Town! It's not only addictive, but also has really annoying music that you won't be able to get out of your head for DAYS.

BTW, got my magnet today - woo-hoo! It will be on my van in the AM.

Hope you have a restful evening!
Still praying (for EVERYTHING for you, Matt and Jonah)!

Love,
Laura

littleleaps said...

You are too cute. I can't do facebook either, but you have to guess why not. But don't take too much time guessing, it's silly I say.

Anonymous said...

I am on FB but have never taken a quiz, cause i don't know how. not sure I NEED to learn,But i Love Rosann I AM SO HER ! Her sense of humor IS ME! Be glad you can find a smile or a laugh anywhere you can.
2shoes

ashpuck said...

You crack me up! I am also addicted to Facebook, I guess I'll have to try the quiz now...

Ashley

The Dolezal Family said...

I was roseanne too...I have 3 boys and they seem normal...so far...

jenlar3 said...

I love FB, but have never taken a quiz. I have been in school continuously since 2002, so I get enough quizzes in my life as it is!!! I went through a phase where I watched the Roseanne reruns. I told my daughters that I enjoyed comparing myself to her and coming out on top! hehehe My favorite show was when DJ was exploring religions. He asked his folks, "What are we?" Roseanne answered, "We are good people." Dan quickly responded, "But we are not practicing!" HAHAHA I love that!!!!

Patrice, whenever I see Roseanne from now on, I will think of you and PRAY!!! (teehee)

Jess said...

Well, at least you aren't in denial... I am always in denial about those quizzes!

mrs. mari said...

i love roaseanne!! she is the 'it' mom for me on tv and the only one that could be a real mom in the real world.

you are real and i love you for it.

blessings.

rabidbutterfly said...

OH, my! I won't even tell you what I got, but Roseanne!
This post proves that you have what it takes...to have a sense of humor during all that is going on.
If you can be likened to her and still laugh, you've got it!

~Caryl~

Lisa said...

You should try the "which dinosaur/which weapon will carry you into battle". Apparently I'll be riding a triceratops and carrying a crossbow. Look out everybody!!

Hilary said...

Too funny! Thank you for giving me a good laugh! Still praying here in South Carolina!

Sylithia said...

lol I to am Roseanne!!!!! Oh so true...

Carol said...

All I can say is that you are an amazing person. I love to read what you write! Your heart, mind and soul flow right onto the pages to be shared with us.
I love to read about how much you love your two precious sons!
I just can't help but think though.....you are not a thing like Roseanne!!

Precious 3 said...

Oh my, LOL. I am totally addicted to FB, but only to stay in touch with friends. I had to learn a while back to stay away from all quizzes, games (except Kidnap, I still play that one), and gifts. I feel bad for "ignoring" friends requests, but I just don't have the time for all that. Sounds like you are not the only Roseanne mom, but don't worry, you are great!! I got addicted for a while to Word Scramble (?), but got discouraged when it said I was as smart as a bully. Praying today is an "up" day! And that soon days will level out, instead of up, down, up, down.

the-mommy-person said...

You crack me up.

Angie Davis said...

this definitely made me laugh! NOT what i was expecting to read about, but i will go ahead and pray for you guys as usual. ;)

Kathryn said...

Hey Trice...I am not surprised. at all. And relating to Rosanne as a mother just makes you realistic ("normal"). Those other moms lived in dreamland. I can't wait to see you tomorrow. Call me if you guys want to get out of the house. Otherwise, I'll call you when I'm coming out tomorrow. Love you!

Mimi said...

I am rolling on the floor right now. You are SO NOT Roseanne!!! Too cute!

Kami

Heather said...

I needed a good laugh!!! That is hilarious!

Michelle said...

hehe, ya know, I haven't taken that one yet. But I bet I'd end up being Roseanne, too!! Don't feel bad. In fact, I'll head over there and take the test. And I bet I'm right!

purejoy said...

ohmygosh hilarious!! and now i totally want to go take that quiz. i just removed about every application like that on my facebook. b/c i'm a facebook purist. give me my old just connect with people facebook.
but now i'm totally intrigued. and i'm takin it.
right now.

purejoy said...

heaving a huge sigh of relief. i am claire huxtable. and apart from the high profile/high salary part, the quiz results were pretty accurate!

i'll have to say i came close to sending poop to the people who would DARE to criticize my little pumpkins!! ha ha!

i'm glad you can lighten your mood (well, who knows about lightening your mood, you did end up with rosanne after all) with a little facebook frivolity. such a fun diversion.

hope you have a blessed and joy-filled day!! you deserve it!

Michelle said...

told you...just took it and I'm Roseanne!! Wanna get together and criticize our kids together?? lol

Lis said...

Don't feel bad, I took the same quiz last week and guess what............ Roseanne... I didn't think it described me at all... Oh well!

janie said...

We need so much of God in this world and we need to know that He loves us even when we have trouble loving Him. I readt this prayer this morning and wanted you to read it also. With love and prayers from a mother that loves you and your family and I am praying for you right now.

*A PRAYER FOR YOU TODAY*

Father God, I choose to rejoice in You. I know that Your goodness goes
way beyond my difficulty. I know that even when I don’t see a way, You are making a way for me. Fill me with Your supernatural peace and joy as I surrender every area of my life to You. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

Melissa said...

I watched the Roseanne clip and my fave part is where she tells Darlene, "Go clean MY room!" I need to train my kids to do that!

I had seen this quiz on FB when my sister took it but didn't take it myself. Now you've gotten my curiosity up and I'm going to have to do it!

By the way, I loved the "Sweet Jonah" pics on the previous post. He is so adorable! Thank you for providing a glimpse into your private world. Still praying in NM.

Meghan said...

Hilarious. :)

Heather from Ontario Canada said...

Too funny...my husband says I'm most like Marie on Everybody Loves Raymond I'd rather be Debra ***smirk**

Penny said...

From the look, and the sound, of it-- your sense of humor is kicking back in. SO glad! Love you and your baby and still praying for him. Despite the blisters-- he is beautiful and looks just like you. Sorry, daddy, he'd be pretty either way, but I call 'em like I see 'em. =)

Morning Glory Minis said...

Hi Patrice,
I have been reading your post for a while, and first I want to say, I am completely in love with your son! He is adorable, and amazing.. we have had the 'pray for Jonah' button on our blog, since I found your blog. http://californiaduecks.blogspot.com/ ) I hope it has increased the prayers for your family. Which brings me to why I am FINALLY leaving a message..... I just got an email from a friend of mine about this song she heard on the radio, and she sent it to all us girls... I immediately thought of you... (your post a few days ago brought me to tears...but I didn't have any words of wisdom to send your way) but now I do

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lr858bYMIz0

More Beautiful You

Little girl fourteen flipping through a magazine
Says she wants to look that way
But her hair isn’t straight her body isn’t fake
And she’s always felt overweight

Well little girl fourteen I wish that you could see
That beauty is within your heart
And you were made with such care your skin your body and your hair
Are perfect just the way they are

There could never be a more beautiful you
Don’t buy the lies disguises and hoops they make you jump through
You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do
So there could never be a more beautiful you

Little girl twenty-one the things that you’ve already done
Anything to get ahead
And you say you’ve got a man but he’s got another plan
Only wants what you will do instead

Well little girl twenty-one you never thought that this would come
You starve yourself to play the part
But I can promise you there’s a man whose love is true
And he’ll treat you like the jewel you are

So turn around you’re not too far
To back away be who you are
To change your path go another way
It’s not too late you can be saved
If you feel depressed with past regrets
The shameful nights hope to forget
Can disappear they can all be washed away
By the one who’s strong can right your wrongs
Can rid your fears dry all your tears
And change the way you look at this big world
He will take your dark distorted view
And with His light He will show
you truth
And again you’ll see through the eyes of a little girl

Heidi
(((hugs))) from California

Wanda Wilkinson said...

I took my magnet to Wrightsville Beach this weekend, My daughter now has here's in Boone, NC..

Glad to see pictures of that beautiful boy...I had been away from the computer for 5 days i walked in my door,signed on the computer & went to your blog.

Please know that I am praying for you, Matt & Jonah.

Also, know that I truly love the 4 of you, just like you were my family. If there was anything I could do to help your lives be better I would.

Take one day at a time, know you are loved & cared for & that Jonah is a miracle..you & Matt have been given the love, joy, heartache, sadness & all possibly feelings to endure whiled raising this wonderful child.

God understands your feelings (the good ones & the bad ones). Remember what He had to go through with His Son!!!!!!

The thousands of prayer warriers are here to intercede for you when you can't pray. I know that feeling..Praise God for the ones that can & do pray for us especially during those times.

I know you love Jonah, Matt & God, but boy as humans we can only handle so much...as I said in a previous post...for some reasons the good days always seem to be followed by a low/bad day...but hopefully those beautiful blues eyes on that wonderful boy of yours can bring a smile to your lips.

Take care & know I love your family.

Cristi said...

Pish Posh

momma said...

oh.my.word!!! i'm so sorry that i'm just laughing and laughing!!!

my husband and i took the "which friends character are you" quiz. i was monica gellar-bing. he was ross gellar. my brother was chandler bing. how twisted is that?!?!? haha. all we could do was laugh and laugh!

Anonymous said...

Don't worry.....I think I am like Roseann for a mom too sometimes! lol I got my magnet yesterday and was very happy to put it on my van!

Ellen from Long Island

LisaL said...

Oh that was toooo funny! I took that same one and got Claire Huxtable (sp??). Roseanne's not a bad one!! You are willing to do what you need for Jonah! It's great to have a "don't mess with me or my kids or I'm gonna mess you up!!" attitude! Honestly, I'm kinda surprised I didn't get Roseanne! You go girl!!

Rachaellh said...

I laughed my butt off reading your post tonight! You guys are in my prayers daily!

Amy said...

I took the quiz and was Claire Huxtable. Totally not right because it said I was a well-paid, high-power woman. Ha! I'm curious to know what your answers were to the questions to give you Roseanne. We'll talk tomorrow. :)

Lorraine-bo said...

I did a lot of quizzes at first, but then I stopped because I don't have time! I'm sure you don't either, but somehow we manage to make time in our lives for frivolity, don't we?! Alas, sometimes it's good to let the brain be mush and let our cares drift away! lol!

Amy T said...

Just don't SLAP Jonah down in the mall parking lot, & all will turn out well! ;)

dragonflyz in June said...

OMG, I just took the same test and got the same results....lol, I knew I liked you and felt a similarity, but whoa.