Monday, April 6, 2009

update - monday, april 6th

Wow, you guys are amazing. I think I was thinking, "Pity, Party of 1," but I should have known I wasn't alone. Thank you for loving us. I can't understand why you do, but it sure means so much to us.

I guess I should make it more clear that I DO have help. Matt's mom is still here, and my mom is helping a lot too (she's local so isn't staying here... although she did nights for me last week - woo-woo - because they had spring break). Debbie will be here through the rest of the week, and next week my brother will be coming for a day, my mom will take off to be with us, and Debbie will be back at the end of the week. We are SURROUNDED by love and support... just wanted to make that clear. But sometimes you still feel alone, even if it is irrational. Not that I would EVER be irrational. Totally NOT my style.

Jonah's dressing change went much better tonight. He only got really upset at the very end when we were bathing and rewrapping his torso. He was ready to be all done. The home health care nurse (who also happens to be Jeannie, my best friend Kathryn's mom) weighed Jonah tonight, and he's up to 8 lbs 10 oz, so that's very good news. I did call the pediatrician today, and she has switched him to Prevacid. I'll give him his first dose with his next feeding. The appointment with the ENT is still on Thursday, and I'll only move it up if the Prevacid doesn't seem to help... although I figure it may take a couple days to see a difference. I am happy about the weight gain, but it still bothers me to see Jonah in so much pain when he's eating. The doctor said everything I'm describing sounds like typical reflux, but that he's probably just in more pain because it's likely he has some blisters in his throat. Poor thing. But if his throat is like the rest of his body, they will come and they will go. He'll heal quickly.

Matt wants me to post about specifics of the dressing change, so you'll know exactly what you're praying for, but I'm too tired tonight to go into all of that. I'll try to give some more details soon.

As far as your comments (the ones I've had a chance to read so far...) -
Jonah is on Magic Mouthwash, although his does not have lidocaine because we give it by syringe, and it's something he swallows. It's a combination of Bendryl, Maalox, and something else I can't remember... I just remember specifically that they said it doesn't have lidocaine.

We can't move dressing changes to the morning (as much as I would LOVE to get it over with), because Matt has to work, and I need his help. Also, because he's on the pain meds, we want him to be on the sleep at night, be awake during the day schedule. If we gave him the meds during the day, he'd be zonked all day, wouldn't eat very well, and would probably be up even more at night.

We DO have to keep him wrapped, even though his arms and legs are looking better. He's still getting new blisters, and you never know when or why they're going to pop up. (He had a new one on his arm, two new ones on his belly, and two new ones on his feet tonight). If he was uncovered, he would hit his arms and legs against things and against himself, and he would get blisters everywhere. The SLIGHTEST friction will cause a new blister.

I don't think he has an infection. His temperature has been good, and he doesn't seem lethargic. He's more irritable because he's starving and tired. And he's tired because he's hungry and waking up to eat a lot. (That's my guess anyway.)

That's all I can remember as far as comments at this point, but the last time I read them, there were only 78. I have some catching up to do. Sheesh.

Here is our family picture. I didn't want to post a smiling picture earlier today (you know, since I was in such a great mood and all), but for now, I'm done feeling sorry for myself. (Don't ask at 3 am.) I have lots more pictures from Gabe's spot I'd like to share, but again, too tired tonight. I need to sleep while I can.

Thanks again for praying for us. Can't you tell it's working already? Even having only read 78 of the comments, I feel so lifted up, loved, and supported. What an amazing thing to be part of the Body of Christ - to be connected by only one thing - the blood of Jesus. You know, just that one little thing. :) Through YOU, God shows me that He's not far off. He's next door, across the country, across the world... He's so close. Thank you for reminding me.

My sweet boys.


61 comments:

Katherine said...

I've been praying all night that Jonah would do better with this dressing change and that the Prevacid will make a difference. Love you guys!

Sailor and Co said...

You are a wonderful mommy..and daddy is wonderful too..

Jennifer W. said...

The picture of the four is you is beautiful. I took one just like it so Avelyn could meet my dad. Special memories. I'm praying you sleep sound tonight!

Anonymous said...

Wow..what a beautiful family you have. You are going through such a trial right now but you are doing it with such grace. Even when you have a little pity party!! ;) You truly are an inspiration with your strength and courage. I pray for your family daily and am so glad the worlds prayers are keeping you guys lifted. I will continue to pray for dressing changes and the upcoming ENT. Hope you get a good rest and I can't wait to see more pictures.
xo LinMarie

EdwinsonFamily said...

What a special picture.
You are doing a great job... and thanks for taking the time to answer OUR questions! Don't feel obligated to do that. We'll wear you out, you know!
Just one thing... don't be discouraged if the Prevacid doesn't do the trick right away. Our Pediatrician told us to expect a week or so for full results. Oh, and the Tucker Sling is something we used... and seemed to help. I don't know if it would be a good option for Jonah, but just wanted to pass that tid-bit along.
Keeping you in prayer!

Kristy said...

Hi Patrice -

It is easy to feel alone, even with people all around you when you are dealing with EB.

I realize that Jonah's EB is MUCH more severe than Carson's, but I wanted to pass this along. As Carson's skin improved, we began to use socks to keep him "wrapped" instead of the kerlex, etc. We would just cut the toes out of a couple of pairs of boys cotton socks and pull them on his arms and legs. The socks seem to move with him a little easier than the kerlex, etc. If we felt that he needed it (if he had a small blister, etc.), we would put some aquaphor on before the socks.

You take care of that precious boy (and yourself) and we'll keep praying for you!

Kristy (mom to Carson, EBS)

Amber Schmidt said...

Now THOSE are some truly beautiful images! Brings tears to my eyes. Gabe's flowers are so pretty and colorful! I know he must adore them!

Somehow.. no matter how many hands there are to help... its just never enough... sigh. When our daughter was in a colostomy it took me months before I could change it on my own...

No matter how demanding the routine I know you will find a routine and God will bless you with just the right amount of time and patience to sail on through!

Hugs and prayers.

Beth said...

It is rather amazing how people that don't even know one another can rally together, can truly care for a baby, a family, that they have never met! I truly believe it is because we love the Lord, He has brought us all to you!! I certainly wasn't searching for Jonah, for you, you just seemed to fall into my lap!

How BLESSED are we that we get to witness this miracle, Jonah's miracle of life!! How BLESSED are we to pray for and support you!! How BLESSED are we to be inspired by you!!

Glad to hear that your spirits are lifted today!! Glad to know you have help! But remember that even with a house full of people, one can still feel very alone, especially during trying times. Continue to lean on God during those times....He will always comfort...but you already knew that :)

Praying for Jonah! Praying for you!

michelle said...

Praying you guys all have peaceful rest tonight and that the prevacid will work well for the little man.

Mike and Molly Spivey said...

I have been praying and thinking about you guys all day long! I told my mom last night that I feel such a love for you guys and I don't even know y'all! :) You're right, that is the blood of Christ connection :)

Aubrey said...

I'm praying for all of you...to have a peaceful night and that the pain will just be gone. It can happen! God is great! Why not ask for big things? :)

The three of you are most certainly loved and thought of by all of us, near and far, even those that haven't "met" you. Jonah has been in our family's hearts and prayers since we heard about him weeks ago. How wonderful that God brings us all together!

Hope you got some good rest!

PS Feel free to vent anytime--better to get it out on us than let it fester. :) (isn't that a strange word?)

Chrissy said...

praying for you! so happy to hear of the weight gain. that has got to make you happy. our family picture looks just like yours, at a cemetery w/ a car seat. Our sons...share birthdays...2.27.09...my Dante is 5 hours and 55 minutes older than Jonah and my daughter Eva would have been 5 weeks older than Gabe (3.17.08 to 3.23.08). too neat! not that we've lost our babies but that thru God I found you and your story and I am now one more praying for your precious family. rest easy tonight! Love and Prayers, Chrissy
www.evajanette.blogspot.com

The Dolezal Family said...

Glad you are feeling better! We all have frustrating moments, especially when caring for a newborn so even given Jonah situation, it is totally common and OK!

Last night as I was tossing and turning for some reason I remembered about these towels I have that are crazy soft. I don't know if they are safe to use on Jonah but you might contact the company and see. The website is: http://www.nanocyclic.com/
It is the Nano Towel. I hope they work, let me know if you have any questions, I can do my best to answer them.

Shannon in MN said...

Patrice, I am so glad that you updated. I have been thinking of you and Jonah all day. It is amazing how many prayers are heard. I know that I to have been angry at God. We all need to voice our anger every now and then and I am glad that you did just that. All some of us can do to help you is to pray that all goes well for your family. Thank you so much for sharing your family with all of us.. We are truly blessed!! God bless!!

Kimberly said...

We will all keep praying. I'm so glad you are better, but don't be afraid to be real. You are doing a great job!

dg darling said...

I keep up with your blog daily and am so sorry to hear about the hard times but I rejoice with you in the good times. Jonah is so sweet! We've never met but I think of you and pray for you multiple times a day. My babies had reflux and oh the pukeage!!!! I can't imagine the frustration of that on top of EB. Bless you honey!

Anonymous said...

Such an amazing story your family has. You are in my prayers.

I just wanted to note, that Prevacid should be given on an empty stomach for it to work. My youngest daughter had a severe case of reflux and was on it. It's best to do either 30 minutes before a feeding or 1 hour after. Also - the liquid suspension tastes HORRIBLE, you can flavor it with grape and it tastes a little better, but we ended going on the solutabs when she was about 3 months old - they were much easier to work with. I really hope it works for you!

Penny said...

so glad you feeling better and that you have some support. I do understand the fact that even though you have people around you can still feel alone.

I am praying for answers and solutions for your appointment on Thursday..... please give some relief so he can eat better.

avbernat said...

I'm so happy that you're feeling a little better tonight. You should be sleeping! Hee! Hee! Although so should I, it's amazing the amount of things you find you MUST do once the baby is down.

Anyhow, I loved the family photos. Very bittersweet but so much love reflecting through the lens.

You are so loved, your boys are so incredibly loved by thousands all over the world! We all have those moments of "great moods" but know that if you ever need someone to talk to or vent to, that's what the blog world is all about.

Did you catch Oprah today? It was all about the community of the Blog World. All of us blogging families are taking over, showing compassion and love for complete strangers. You and your family will forever be in my life.

Analiza

Melissa said...

Sometimes all we need is a reminder that God is there...and sometimes he uses friends to send the message I think. Whatever the case, I'm glad that last night went better and that your spirits have lifted a bit. I'm also glad that Jonah handled the dressing changes a bit better this go-round. You guys know you stay in my prayers. We have to be at the hospital at 6:30 this morning for Bryson's surgery, so please offer up a little prayer for him if you have a second...it's supposed to be minor, but I still hate the anesthesia...he's had so much of it in his life. Anyway, before I start my own pity party right now over that, I'm going to go. Know that you guys are loved, cared for, and prayed for, every day...

Krus Family said...

Don't know you but certaintly feel for you. I have no experience with EB but I do as a mother and can only imagine how it hurts to see him hurt. You are in my thoughts and prayers daily. May Gods will be done in everything and may you have the strength to be all that you are destined to be. You must be an amazing daughter to God to be blessed with 2 of his choice spirts, one that didn't even need to be here and one that needs all that you cna give him. Remember in the good moments that you are blessed, greatly and that all things in life are for our good and our growth. From a caring and praying sister in God, Kristin

Anonymous said...

Continuing to pray for your family. Praying for strength and peace for you.

Barbara in AZ.

Sus said...

LIfting you up to HIM in prayer! God is good. God is with you. The pic of you 4 is amazing---quite the family. Praying for you to receive rest, comfort and to feel the love of our Lord Jesus all around you.

Erin Hingley said...

I am thankful for the weight gain and smoother dressing change. Praise God! It's the little things that keep us going, isn't it? Jonah and you (and matt) are never far from my thoughts. Thank you for sharing your family photos...what a beautiful family. Love you all!
Prayerfully,
Erin in VA
youmeandwipee.blogspot.com

Heather said...

My son has severe reflux and is on Prevacid, and I wanted to share with you an awesome way to give it. Put a couple drops of water on a baby spoon, let the tablet dissolve in that, then spoon feed it. It goes in easy, and all of the necessary granules go right in!

Praying for you daily.
Heather
Charleston, SC

Alyson said...

Your cheerfullness just brightened up my day!!! I am elated to know that you your spirit has been lifted!! You and your husband are doing such a great job!! I know it can be TRYING at times, but if you look past those hard times, you'll see that they are just a little bump in the road :0)

God is awesome!!!

Blessings!!

Alyson

http://wellensfamily.blogspot.com

Sarah said...

Patrics,

While you have help, make sure you sleep as much as possible. You won't have it unendingly (you wouldn't want it that long anyway:-, so while you have it take advantage of it. Rest, rest, rest. Take naps, veg out, let others watch Jonah while he's sleeping and even trust them to do a few things for him on their own. It'll make a world of difference for you. I know it's hard---we women always want to entertain and take care of people in our home, but this time you just have to go against that feeling and rest.

Glad you are feeling a little bit better as of this post. I hope your night went well. Praying for you and the family:o)

Kristen said...

Sometimes I wonder if I should leave a comment...like maybe it's taking too much of your time...but by your comment on the last post it seems like they are an encouragement to you. :) I just want to tell you that my daughter (2 years old) and I have built praying for Jonah (and Stellan) into our prayer time every single night. (I pray for him throughout the day too) No matter how I phrase the prayer for the boys, she always echos in her own words, "Help Jonah." I feel that there is huge power in the prayer of children.
They don't doubt. They don't question God. They just pray. And while we as adults think so much about the future and all the possibilities, children just ask. They want it now...So my little girl will keep praying for your little boy!
We love you with the love of our healing Savior!

Anonymous said...

Just wanted you to know that you have been added to my prayer list. God has placed you on my heart. May peace, favor, and grace abound in and around each of you in this day.
Love,
Amber

Elle said...

You are in my family's prayers. My children constantly want to know how Jonah is doing- and constantly pray for him. We are praying for strength, peace, and grace for you and Matt, and healing, sleep, and comfort for Jonah. I know you are tired. Hang in there. Never never be afraid to be sad, angry, or anything else. God doesn't mind. This precious baby is going to bring you more joy than you can imagine. Please stay rested and make sure you take some time for yourself. We have fallen in love with your family, and know the Lord has special things planned for Jonah. We can't wait to see what they are!

Merri Lawson said...

If the prevacid doesn't work, you may want to give prilosec a try. My son had reflux & that was third medicine that we tried w/him & the only one that really worked. He's 2 now & just got off it, so it worked great for a long time! I hope the prevacid works for you though & so glad things are going better. :)

Tracy said...

My son was on Zantac for a year before switching to Prevacid. It took about a week for it to "kick in," but the difference was night and day. The Prevacid has been wonderful, and hopefully it can give Jonah some relief!!

Anonymous said...

Please don't be so hard on yourself - and don't underestimate the power of HORMONES! Mine came raging in at two months post-partum, smack in the middle of caring for a medically fragile child. It is not easy. But I am praying for you and checking on Jonah every day. He is a beautiful gift from God and you are blessed to be chosen as his mother.

Linda said...

I admire your strength-and appreciate the honest way you express your feelings-of course you feel angry-it seems so unfair and sometimes so much more than it is possible to handle-that can't be denied. God is pretty tough-He can handle some anger coming His way-especially when He knows how helpless it can feel when you want to make it better and comfort Jonah and can't. Your Faith is so strong-God will help you through the toughest times. And he has sent friends and family to give you the emotional and physical support you need. I will continue to pray-for your specific prayer requests and also for strength and for a cure or treatment that will free Jonah of his pain and bandages. Take care.

Anonymous said...

I'm so very glad to have this update on you as well as Jonah. I think the picture is beautiful and very special in ways that no one who hasn't experienced the loss of a child will ever comprehend truly, weird though, because it tugs at my heart everytime i see his grave and watching you trying to take care of your new son on top of including the thoughts of missing your first born son. Very touching. I've never been so inspired by such a wonderful person as you and i find myself reminding my own kids (and myself) to not complain about the simple things in life that didnt work out the way we wanted---but to remember that people around us are suffering and needing prayers more than we can ever imagine. I'm proud to pray for you and your husband and son and i do it daily, often times more than a dozen times per day. Bless you everyday Patrice, keep trying to make it up that hill---we're all behind you! Robin @ TR and the gang!

Jessica mommy to Alex/ RTS said...

Prevacid was a miracle for us! I hope it is for you too! Dont forget to change the dose as he grows (we did). The pills work better than the liquid prevacid.
Sorry, I hate it when people give medical advice when it wasnt asked for.

Channe said...

what beautiful pictures - I'm glad that you are feeling better!!

Anonymous said...

Patrice, I have just read your update and I must say I am praising God for the change. I am glad that you have a means by which you can reach out to others, and then to see and feel prayers from all over the world being answered on your behalf. It is so uplifting. I was glad to visit with you yesterday, and to finally see your little man face to face. I am glad to run errands or help at the house on an "as needed" basis. And always know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Jonah is a doll baby, and as we know how to pray, we are all blessed to know of the answers that God is so gracious to provide. Thank you for allowing us to share in these tiny but important miracles. You are loved by many, but especially by God.
Sandy

Nicole said...

I am so, so sorry that you guys are facing all of this. My heart breaks for you - life seems so unfair - and I've been praying, praying, praying for you guys! While much of what you are facing isn't "good" - we know we serve a Good God - one who is good ALL THE TIME - and I am praying He'll do amazing and miraculous things for you and for sweet baby Jonah. Love and prayers from Indiana!

Stephanie said...

You aren't the first to think the Lord has forgotten you. These verses popped into my head as I was thinking of you. How cool since you are nursing so much to think that the Lord is closer than a nursing mother to you!!!

Isa 49:15,16
“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
Though she may forget,
I will not forget you!
See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
your walls are ever before me.
********************************

He has engraved you on the palms of His hands, Patrice!!

Much love-
Stephanie

Tara said...

What a beautiful family you have. I am so glad everyone loves and is praying for you.. including me! I do think it's so cool how we(the body of Christ) can pray and it makes a huge difference. Have a great day today.. you are loved!!

Hugs from Iowa,
Tara

Anonymous said...

So glad to log on & see that things are slightly better this morning. Praying for you constantly throughout the day.

Hope the eating improves with the prevacid (which has been a miracle drug for us). Just a non-medically-informed suggestion on the feeding/frequent waking. I know you said he wasn't eating well & therefore hungry & irritable -- but this is an idea that might help at least a bit.

I think you're pumping for Jonah (if not, disregard the following!) - if so, (and I can't even BEGIN to imagine how you're finding the time to do so!), a trick that my LC taught me when pumping for my son was to refrigerate the milk (or let stand for ~1 hour @ room temp) and skim the fatty part off the top to feed him during/after a feeding - that's the most caloric part of the milk & may help fill him, allowing him to go for longer stretches at night. [The non-fatty milk can be saved for a later bottle feeding when he's not so hungry or frozen for up to 6 months & used to mix w/ cereal when he transitions to solids]. We did this for our son's evening feeds when he was little & it seemed to help a bit (don't do at every feeding, though -- too rich for most babies!). Additionally, babies go through growth spurts at regular intervals & this will result in more waking/increased hunger.

Hoping he heals quickly & that you continue to be blessed and comforted by the love that surrounds you.

Lorraine-bo said...

Praying the prevacid helps Jonah's eating! Thank you for sharing a couple of beautiful pictures!

Stacey said...

I am so glad you feel so much better. That is what God is capable of. I have been praying for dressing changes to go better and for God to take on Jonah's pain. I have also been praying specifically for the reflux to be healed! No more pain for your little boy.
God Bless YOU,
<><

Anonymous said...

Hey Patrice, I don't know if this will help with Jonah's reflux, or if it will work with Jonah's condition, but my son had terrible reflux and we started putting him in his car seat to sleep and that fixed the problem. We didn't strap him in, just put him in the seat and put the seat in the crib so we wouldn't worry about him. Worked like a charm! Just a thought...By the way, we are still praying every day for you all in Virginia!

Ebeling Family Blog said...

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you," declares the Lord.
Jer. 29:11
Know that many, many more people are now praying for you- I am SO glad I found this blog(through a friend of a friend of a friend- something like that:)
I'm part of a prayer team here in Milwaukee, and we will definitely be praying for peace, healing, and miracles to happen in your life!
this is the day the Lord has made- let us rejoice and be glad in it!

Misty Rice-Baniewicz said...

Just stopping by today to say that I posted about you guys on my blog.... in hopes to send more prayers worriers your way and love and support.

God Bless.

Angela said...

Been praying for little Jonah and you guys often. I am so happy things are going better.

As far as my experience with acid reflux, Prevacid worked better for our son, Noah, after he developed a tolerance to increased dosages of Zantac. However, we did wean him off the Zantac over a 2 week period while giving Prevacid since it can take up to 2 weeks for Prevacid to take full effect. This was actually advised by our GI specialist. I gave Zantac 2 times a day and then Prevacid at bedtime making sure that there was a least a 4 hour time gap between giving Zantac and Prevacid since you don't want both drugs in the bloodstream at the same time. After a week he got Zantac in the AM and Prevacid in the PM. When he was off of Zantac we switched to giving him Prevacid in the AM. The only drawback to Prevacid is that it's a pain to wait 30 minutes after dosing to feed, especially when you are breastfeeding.

All that being said, Prevacid has worked wonders at controlling Noah's acid reflux and I thank God for the wise GI specialist he guided us to. I pray that Jonah has a similar experience so that he can at least eat comfortably.

Valerie said...

Hi! A friend of mine pointed me to your blog to pray for your family & that is what I am now doing! You are doing a great job through all of this - hang in there & God will be there with you (and I think it's okay to be angry from time to time). I know it must be hard - little ones wear us out & you have a lot of extra worries and care taking for your special little guy. He's precious!

Claire said...

What lovely pictures. I'll be praying.

Cxx

Cathy said...

I love the picture of the family of four. God Bless your family.

Sandy said...

Your pictures at Gabe's spot break my heart in one way, yet there is peace about them as I see both of you smiling . . . I've said it a million times and I'll probably say it a million more . . . I absolutely do not understand how people get through trials and tribulations without JESUS! Keep smiling my friends! HE IS NEAR.
Love and Hugs from Stokes County,
Sandy Moore

Casie Creech said...

I am so glad you are feeling better. As I anxiously clicked to your blog, I had a huge smile when I read the 1st words, "Wow, you guys are amazing". Not because your readers are amazing, but because I knew instantly that you were feeling better and things were looking up. We all need a little pity party every now and then.

P.S.-LOVE the family photos. They are sweet and so special.

Michelle in Va said...

So glad you are feeling uplifted. Prayer is so amazing and powerful. Your family pics are beautiful. Continuing to pray for sweet Jonah and you and Matt and your families.
With love in Christ,
Michelle in Va

Robin & Slater said...

Patrice,

Hey! I have been trying to write you something for a couple of days but everytime I start typing someone literally yells 'momma'...
Anyway, I read your previous post about being angry ... I think it's ok to angry at God, at people, at doctors, anybody and everybody -- I truly believe God understands that we are only human and although we do rely on him for everything in our lives sometimes when we are tired or frustrated or get our feelings hurt we start asking why or blaming others or just getting furious...
ok, now that I probably haven't made any sense I also wanted to tell you that I think you are doing GREAT!!! (and your husband too)--- just remember to rest when you can b/c like any newborn sleep for the parents is precious!!

...lots of prayers to your family...

Robin

Kelli said...

Everyone needs to throw a pity party every once in a while. You seem to be doing better today. Still praying for all of your family to have strength to care for sweet Jonah and for you to be able to rest peacefully.

Stephanie said...

So glad you are feeling alittle better today. Continuing to keep you all in my prayers!!!! the family pic is priceless!!!! BEAUTIFUL

Country Roads said...

You are an amazing family. You'll never know how many are praying for Jonah. I'm have been following and praying for your family and will continue to pray that he does well on his new medicine, keeps gaining weight and that his changes go well. God is with you every step of the way - pity party or not - he'll always love you!

Anonymous said...

Amen, sister. Isn't it amazing to be part of the body of Christ? I pray that He keeps revealing himself to you in the Most Holy and intimate ways! That He keep healing Jonah's blisters and that He'll heal Jonah's body all together. I also pray that He'll give you the courage to break down when you need to, to have a pity party, and know it's completely okay. Because of him, WE (i'm a perfectionist) have the freedom from having to be perfect, from keeping up appearances, and from having to keep it all together. You are a blessing, my sister in Christ!

Laura
Oxford, MS

Anonymous said...

Patrice -
With what you have described with Jonah's reflux (or similar), it sounds a lot like issues my kids dealt with. I don't know if you are still pumping and feeding him breast milk or if he is on formula, but IF he is on breast milk, you might be able to settle his tummy somewhat (in addition to meds) with your milk by pumping longer on one side and getting your milk to let down more than once - increasing the fat content, and decreasing the lactose content. The first milk is high lactose/low fat and can upset tummies if not enough fatty milk follows. With both my kids, I ended up having to feed on just one side per feeding, and it helped their comfort level (and weight gain!) immensely. You may know all this already, but I wanted to offer it just in case! (Assuming of course that you are even feeding him breast milk).

Glad to hear you are feeling more yourself today, although I doubt ANYONE blames you AT ALL for having normal human emotions (least of all God, since He made you that way). I think God is probably happy that you are willing to come to Him with honesty rather than pretending it's all ok when it's not - I know that's what I would want my children to do.

Many prayers coming your way -
Melanie (Warner) Peden

Katy said...

Thank you for sharing your family photo... so precious. Praying everyday for sweet Jonah and family.